Relationships

     Hi

    I'm back today again, with the all in all, important and encompassing subject.. RELATIONSHIPS

      Let's understand:
     To Relate means...To connect, to interact, to be in touch with people who may  be your relatives or      otherwise.
     Relatives are those in whose family you are either born into, or  which family you are married into .     The other section of people, could belong to one of the categories which we had discussed in the             fourth episode, where in i had mentioned  groups like acquaintances, contacts, colleagues,                     companions, comrades and friends.
     How we relate with them, how we started off with them, how did the association proceed?
     Did it bind two different sects with one another by desire, design or compulsion?   Was their bonding      healthy and wanted, or was it under undue pressure, force or coercion   needs to be understood!!.
    Was there some element of warmth, likeness , love, and or fondness? Was there any kinship                  amongst them?
     Only in-depth penetration into the psychology of their association would be able to give it a Name,         position and station.

     By Definition:
     Relationship can be  explained as
     1. A  connection,   an association, or an involvement.
     2. Connection between persons by blood or marriage.
     3. An emotional or other connection between people

     Relationship can be qualified as per the way they progress between two bodies
     They can be Good, bad or ugly
     A Healthy relationship  involves honesty,   trust,   respect and open communication between              partners / groups. Effort and compromise from both people/parties is the underlying must. There can      be no imbalance of power. Partners /people must respect each other's independence and give space.

     Advantage of good relationships:
    If they are healthy,   they will lower rates of anxiety and depression, heighten self-esteem,   help         provide greater empathy, and assist in developing more trusting and cooperative relationships.               Besides this strong, healthy relationships can also help to strengthen your immune system,               help you recover from disease,  and may even lengthen your life , because a healthy relationship         augurs in a warm, healthy and positive environment which is a prerequisite to quick recovery.
 .
    Basic Types of Relationships

    1)  FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS
   
    Also called  kinship  (like siblings, parents, grandparents, first cousins, )  describe how two                 people are connected or related, usually through   common ancestors.   Children feel secure and             loved  when they have strong and positive family relationships. Positive family relationships   help         families resolve conflict,   work as a team and enjoy each other's company.   Positive family                 relationships are built on quality time,   communication,   teamwork and   appreciation of each      other.

    

 2) FRIENDSHIPS
    
     Friendship is an unconditional interpersonal relationship where individuals enter into by their         own sweet will and choice.

   Friendship is a relationship where there are no formalities and individuals enjoy each other's presence.    Friendship can be between  individuals of the same sex; but can exist between  Man & Woman as           well. 

    Many are want to say that the Man
   & woman relationship   cannot be a Pious one.
   This is a statement that has been
   a controversial topic for centuries and no one  "QED"  will always be true. A lot will depend upon          the affected parties : the views of the family and  community in general gains priority  (we, being           social animals) , but a lot depends upon how they conduct themselves.
   Healthy friendships and relationships also mean learning to respect and trust each other. People                respect each other for who they are; at times they may disagree with each other also. But with respect     and trust, they can talk about how they feel and work things out.

    ACQUAINTANCES:
    A contact you have met briefly,
    A person one knows slightly, but who is not a close friend.
   "a   wide circle of friends and acquaintances"  exist,   how many really turn into colleagues, and Or        friends is  subject to circumstance, need, desire  or likened to that person.and that will be the basis on    which a relationship will sit with acquaintances.


    ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS
    

    A romantic relationship is defined as mutual, ongoing and voluntary interaction  between two                partners that is characterized by specific expressions of affection and intimacy  where trust, and           faith  reign supreme, and there is an all pervading desire to be always together in thought, act and        deed with a desire to be in such a relationship till infinity. A lot can be said and written though.

    SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP
    Also called:
    Armour, Affair, Liaison, or Involvement.
    In simple language as the term indicates, implies having intimacy physically n emotionally.
    Could be within marriage or even out of marriage.
    These days even young adolescents are into such kind of relationships.

    WORK RELATIONSHIPS
   

    Workplace relationships are unique interpersonal relationships with important implications for the        individuals in those  organizations in which the relationships exist and develop. Workplace                   relationships directly affect a worker's ability and drive to succeed.

    SITUATIONAL RELATIONSHIPS

    relationships (sometimes called "situationships")
    Situationships can be defined as a romantic relationship that lacks commitment and the associated        norms and expectations  are brought together under certain conditions / situations also known                as__LABEL FREE relationships, here's why experts think the so-called situationships have                become so common.  They are  Less than a relationship, but more than a casual encounter.


    CORE/  COMPONENTS TO A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP
    They can  be   also called as Prerequisites of a good healthy relationship.
    All healthy relationships share the following  core components:
    Mutual respect
    Mutual trust
    Mutual affection
    Self affection
    Inclusion
    Open   Communication
    We’ll cover each component in a little detail:
    1) RESPECT in the relationship means that you both hold each other in high regard. When you             respect someone, you admire them for certain qualities they possess and/or the character they                 embody.

    TRUST : Trust in each other means you take each other at your word. If one person says they’re             going to do something, the other person assumes they’ll do as they say. If someone makes a mistake,      the other person expects them to be honest and tell them so. In fact, trust really just comes down to         each person being completely honest with the other, even when it’s uncomfortable.
     When u trust your team members,
     U can be open & honest in your thoughts and actions.

    AFFECTION
    In healthy relationships affection is freely given and received. Healthy couples don’t need to remind     themselves to show their partner that they love and appreciate them. They just do. And the recipient     receives affection with affection rather than turning it away or taking it for granted. If physical                contact and sex are important for the relationship, each person engages enthusiastically (of course, no     one will always be “in the mood,” but for the most part, this should hold true).Problems in any or all     of these areas could mean that one or both partners have an insecure attachment style or it could            mean that the relationship is flawed in some other fundamental way.

    SELF AFFECTION:
    You’ve probably heard about the importance of loving yourself, forgiving yourself, and treating            yourself with compassion.
    Self affection,Self approval, Self kindness, Self love  , Self compassion, Self recognition. All these        individually and collectively have a  impact on our lives.

    INCLUSION:
    Inclusion is defined as the state of being included or being made a part of something. When multiple     people are all invited to be part of a group, this is an example of the inclusion of many people: the act     of including  

    OPEN COMMUNICATION;
    Refers to the ability of the individuals to freely convey their thoughts and ideas to one another.               Example: In a Corporate set up, after a presentation, the session is thrown open for active, open  to        and fro   communication where information between people should be transparent, honest, consistent,     and delivered in a dependable way. Where the employees openly communicate, they express their        thoughts, feelings, emotions, and plans clearly and assertively.

    By now, I'm sure, you would have either got fed up of me, or my topic on Relationships.
    Yes friends, if on   one side it's a boring topic,
    Let me warn you, caution you,  that Good healthy  happy and contented    relationships is  the BASIC     FUNDA of Good living.
    We can write and write and continue to write till the cows come home, but, until we understand the        predicaments, the situations, the status, the prevailing circumstances, we cannot analyse the depth or     gravity of the situation.
    Relationship can be Good, bad or ugly.
    No relationship is ideal. No situation is perfect!!
    Let me put forward some queries:
    1)Who benefits more from a relationship?
    2) We did every thing right, yet things  went hay wire!
    3) We assumed they were compatible, but very soon it was   obvious it was not!!
    4) Greed,  Hunger, Power,
    Jealousy, Being envious, Financial divide, the reasons will run a mile.

    Why do relationships sour?
    What suddenly goes wrong? . 

    Life is a Jig saw puzzle    

 

    The weirdest puzzle of them all. You try & try   &   try,
    Yet the end product
    becomes a Bheja Fry
    Hail & Rain.. Thunder & storm
    Come   let's all sing a song.


    An old song runs some thing like this....
    HERE WE GO ROUND.....
    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    On a cold and frosty morning

    This is the way we wash our face
    Wash our face
    Wash our face
    This is the way we wash our face
    On a cold and frosty morning
   
    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    On a cold and frosty morning

    This is the way we brush our teeth
    Brush our teeth
    Brush our teeth
    This is the way we brush our teeth
    On a cold and frosty morning

    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    On a cold and frosty morning

    This is the way we comb our hair
    Comb our hair
    Comb our hair
    This is the way we comb our hair
    On a cold and frosty morning

    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    On a cold and frosty morning

    This is the way we put on our clothes
    Put on our clothes
    Put on our clothes
    This is the way we put on our clothes
    On a cold and frosty morning

    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    The mulberry bush
    Here we go 'round the mulberry bush
    On a cold and frosty morning

   
    So, before I pen off today, I'm sure, we now know for sure that Relations with relatives are not                 acquired, they are in born.
    We cannot choose our relatives. But   Friends, contacts and colleagues, the other category are                 contacts  are ACQUIRED,   and that need to be cultivated with a purpose and intent.
    The said  certain rules which need to be adhered to , to define a healthy, warm and ongoing                     relationship with either/ or categories I have tried to touch on, are the important, but cardinal facts n     fundas we have discussed here today.

    As I say Bye bye today..

    Our LIFE I s like a Mulberry bush ( 10_mulberry bush intertwined)
    Twined, intertwined, enmeshed with happenings , some that are in our control, but most that are             beyond our control.
     How we relate to them all, how we manage to salvage , and maintain our  sanctity,   how we swim         swiftly and uneventfully  across the phases and stages of our life will depend on HOW WE                     HANDLE OUR   Relationships.
     Once again _time to bid adieu, 

     but do dwell on all that i have written today, and mull into your own set o f relationships.
     More to follow.. Cheeriyo.......